Have you ever:
washed the dishes?
cut the grass?
taken a shower?
The never ending tasks!
Every pill brings me no closer to sanity, but I try them; I take them.
Pharmacological Russian Roulette
Sadness has settled over my heart.
A student of mine once wrote"...and the birds of sadness had nested in their hair."
My heart is that home: coated! Layers of metal make it hard, constrict it, lock it off.
The home of steel spiders spinning their web of containment.
I throw pebbles at the cull of my heart.
Nothing can break through as I breakdown.
A moment of respite is granted as sleep takes my illness deeper.
The ability to smile in the den of a lion.
I touch the teeth, feeling their sharpness, hoping the waking does not bring further attacks.
Can I make friends with their furry beast or will my death be its last meal?
Never!
The pain drops back in, waking the lion whose claws can tear through the fortress, only to tear open the heart and spill my blood.
The weight of sadness, sedating me. Keeping me from acting. Holding me down.
Who is awake now? Who am I? What is left of the me I remember? The boy of a thousand smiles lost in the remaining cobwebs of steel.
I hold on to the promise that life will have purpose once again. The promise that a smile will not be false and a fear will be the exception that makes the rule.
I know it will get better, after all this is life and not a nightmare...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Popular Posts
-
So tonight I had a shoot at my place for the poster of the play I am directing. I picked up one of the actresses and worked on her makeup ... -
Flame rolls off the bark licking the stiffness from my fingers. Face flushes Deep red pressing to the surface Boyish good looks or childi...
-
When you're feeling sick The world contains no odor Will this ever end?
-
Cacophony of voices fill the room with bodies in every position: Standing, sitting, squatting Adults more difficult to control than children...
-
Sun sits on the horizon Time to rise then Take the stage A brilliant sage Or a failure You're never sure Until the lights are out ...
-
This was inspired by a poem which was inspired by a story which was inspired by a young boy on a bus holding a dogs collar. He holds her w...
-
So both of my daughters have fevers and one of them is teething. I think this is the challenge that mothers deal with on a regular basis th...
-
Have you ever: washed the dishes? cut the grass? taken a shower? The never ending tasks! Every pill brings me no closer to sanity, bu...
-
Why do I shake at the tree of the populous? A leaf falling from the branch of a poplar. Blown by a wind of p...
-
So I have noticed that I am constantly working to keep from allowing my mind to be idle. When I am on a planning period at work I will list...
Just gotta say again, I love that last line.
ReplyDelete